When Support Becomes a Liability
There was this woman who was supposed to support our program as the “case worker.” She was ONLY required to help OUR students, no one else. Well…she was basically the most useless person on the entire planet and it is safe to say, I couldn’t stand her…but I bit my tongue and smiled for two years because that’s just what I had to do.
Advocating for a Student — and Paying the Price
There was a student who has extreme behavioral needs but was in a general education classroom. I was called to support this child time and time again until the CST (Child Study Team) decided that MAYBE just MAYBE he should be in my classroom.
The parents befriended me and thanked me for always helping their son, which was nice. So we became friendly before he was even under my care. HOWEVER, the parents trusted ME more than they trusted the ADMIN and that became very clear. I remember one meeting where they basically told the admin team to shut up and asked me for my opinion. What was I supposed to do? LIE?
So I told the truth and suggested additional supports and a 1:1 paraprofessional or aide. Want to know why this was an issue? MONEY.
Strike One
So, I was called into my principal’s office a few hours after the meeting and was formally written up for being insubordinate. WHAT? I was absolutely shocked and disgusted. I didn’t do anything wrong. I advocated for my student. That is what we are SUPPOSED to do.
That was strike 1 and I had no idea how bad it was about to get.
A Crisis Waiting to Happen
I don’t know how much time went by but there was a student of mine who was losing his ever loving mind. Throwing sh*t across the room — and I’m not talking like pencils and paper. I’m talking desks and chairs. But this wasn’t out of the ordinary. I can’t tell you how many things were destroyed in those rooms.
Anyways…He ended up getting out of the classroom and into the hallway, which wasn’t the end of the world because we were in our own wing with double doors that were always closed. However… there was ALSO a set of exterior doors on the opposite side of the hallway. Those doors were the bane of my existence. Chasing a child in the hallway was one thing. Chasing them OUTSIDE around the building? Absolutely not.
When No One Shows Up
So…he’s in the hallway. I have one staff member blocking the exterior doors, and another blocking the other doors. I see the case manager and ask her for help…but she was too busy chatting it up with someone else on the other side of the doors.
Which is fine…I’m not any more important than the other staff members. But when there is a crisis and your SOLE RESPONSIBILITY is to support these students and THIS staff, I expect you to do just that.
I was clearly irritated, so I “yelled” at her to assist…and I guess she didn’t like that — because she went right to the witch herself and tattled on me.
I bet you can guess what happened…second write up.
It was CLEAR that this was a witch hunt…I just didn’t know how far it would go.
The Incident That Changed Everything
Well well well…the kid that was losing his sh*t that day got hurt in the “safe space” while trying to escape as we attempted to keep the door closed. Yes — this was as chaotic as it sounds.
But remember earlier when I said I had been voicing concerns? This was EXACTLY why.
His foot became stuck between the door and the door jamb and he ended up with a bruise. He wasn’t severely injured. No limbs were falling off. But guess who JUMPED at the opportunity to accuse me of PURPOSELY injuring him?
Yep. The boss herself.
Administrative Leave & A Nightmare Unfolds
Within an hour, I was called to her office, formally written up, and placed on administrative leave. I was absolutely beside myself. Filled with anger, disgust, heartbreak — all of it.
The kicker? I immediately contacted the student’s mother, explained everything that happened, and she thanked me repeatedly.
But that didn’t matter.
I was soon called in for a formal investigation, assigned legal counsel, and spent weeks in absolute emotional hell while they tried to determine if I had intentionally harmed a child.
Waiting for the Verdict
After what felt like a million years — but was probably about a month — I received the letter explaining the findings.
In New Jersey, the Division of Children and Families (DCF) uses a four-tier system for investigative findings…(your explanation remains exactly as written here — no changes needed)
While I would have hoped for a fully Unfounded determination, my case was classified as Unfounded with no evidence of wrongdoing. All potential charges were dropped.
Relief washed over me — but so did anger.
The Toll It Took
For six months, I battled with lawyers, debating whether to sue the district for retaliation, harassment, and defamation of character.
It destroyed my mental health.
And ultimately, I walked away.
The Plot Twist No One Could Have Predicted
The silver lining in ALL of this…Because I was placed on administrative leave, I was paid for the remainder of the school year and my health insurance stayed active through August.
We were expecting our twins in November, meaning we would have been uninsured by September.
But life had other plans.
Our twins arrived on August 20th — three months early.
They spent nearly two months in the NICU in Utah. Both babies were million-dollar miracles — and every single dollar was covered by insurance.
If that’s not fate, I don’t know what is.
The Aftermath
Since leaving that district, they’ve changed nearly everything about how MY program runs — most importantly, they removed the door from the “safe space.”
Funny how that works.
The Superintendent “retired.”
The case manager was let go.
Several others were removed or left.
The principal? Still there.
And I pray I never run into her in public.
So…Become a Teacher They Say
Just know this:
ANYTHING and EVERYTHING can be twisted and used against you.
I truly hope no teacher I love ever has to experience something like this.
Starting Over
So what did I do next?
I swore I’d never teach in a school again. Instead, I became a Developmental Interventionist in Early Intervention, working with babies ages 0–3.
It was perfect for that season of life.
I made my own schedule.
Picked my own cases.
Spent time with my own babies.
But eventually…I missed the classroom.
A New Beginning
A friend called me about a maternity leave opening in the next town over.
Three months. That’s it.
Or so I thought.
Well…here I am. Sitting at my desk. In the same school. Still teaching.
And I LOVE it.
Full Circle
There is nonsense in every school district — but nothing like what I survived.
And remember when I talked about tenure in Part 1?
By the time you read this, I will officially have it.
(February 3rd — and yes, I cried.)
To Be Continued…
That’s it for now…but trust me — there are MANY more stories coming about Special Education and teaching life.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you for listening.
Xoxo
Mr. I
