As you know, we’ve been potty training and felt like we were doing really good. Of course, accidents happen, but how do we get them to stop? Should I just consider myself to be a failed parent because I couldn’t teach my child to potty train? If I can’t teach him this, what else will I be bad at doing?
Isn’t it crazy the things we think about when our child has an accident? I still think about the times my son had an accident and I thought to myself, “Why isn’t he doing this? Why would anyone want to wet their pants?” Clearly I was a little slow (as I am with most things) and not thinking about the fact that he’s almost three.
Did You Know?
The average age for boys, according to University of Michigan Health System, is 31 months. That’s just two and a half so I don’t feel like we are really failing at anything. But when you go on Pinterest or talk to friends they say they trained their kid in a week. How are they doing it?
Well, Scott J Goldstein, M.D., a pediatrician at The Northwestern Children’s Practice in Chicago says, “It is very common for occasional setbacks in the early days, months, or even years of potty training, but remember that a truly potty trained child should want to go on the potty. So a child who has several accidents every day and doesn’t seem to care about [them] should not really be considered ‘potty trained.'”
This brought a ton of comfort to me. I seriously felt like we were drifting down a slippery slope. We had just overcome night-time accidents and felt like we had conquered the world. Then we had accidents during the day again and I felt like we were back to square one. Summer has been hard to keep a steady routine. Every slip up comes after a late night or a fun adventure.
Accidents Happen and I’m Annoyed
So then what do we need to do? My biggest problem is I would overreact and that’s exactly what you shouldn’t do. Look, accidents happen and it’s not the end of the world if you have to throw some clothes in the washer because I am sure there are plenty of other clothes that could use a good washing too.
As a parent though, you need to try to figure out what the root problem is though. Forever I was wondering why my son was always wetting the bed, and then it dawned on me. At night I like to have huge water while I am working on the computer or watching Bachelorette. He would take a drink without me watching or he would ask nicely for a drink of water. I wouldn’t think anything of it because it wasn’t like he was drinking a lot. Well, once I cut that off by a certain time we didn’t have an issue of bed wetting.
Back to the Basics
When we were first potty training we would ask constantly if he needed to go to the bathroom and would help him. Since we figured he was fine and completely potty trained we stopped asking and the accidents have returned. The kid is busy and just wants to play, I get it, but you have to remind them sometime to take a break and hit the pot.
Of course it’s human nature to sit back and look at “how great” other parents are doing thing with their kids, but know that you are doing an amazing job. Just when you think you have finally nailed down potty training an accident happens and you feel like a failure. You’ve got this and so does your child. Eventually we all get potty trained (minus the few moms that tend to pee every time they laugh) but it doesn’t happen overnight. Stick with it because shit happens.
